German Rocket Cats of the 16th Century
Those Germans. If nothing else, you have to admit they’re pretty imaginative when it comes to warfare. The University of Pennsylvania recently digitized manuscripts which reveal that even as far back as the 16th century, there were some pretty interesting ideas regarding how to best besiege an enemy city. If you never thought pussy could be used as a weapon, then think again. As the 16th century manuscripts show, there were actual arguments being made for how cats and birds could be used as some kind of living missiles to blitzkrieg unsuspecting towns. Here is a translated excerpt:
“Create a small sack like a fire-arrow … if you would like to get at a town or castle, seek to obtain a cat from that place. And bind the sack to the back of the cat, ignite it, let it glow well and thereafter let the cat go, so it runs to the nearest castle or town, and out of fear it thinks to hide itself where it ends up in barn hay or straw, it will be ignited.”
First of all, you have to be impressed by the deviousness of selecting a cat from the very town or castle you wish to destroy. Who would suspect a local cat?? It’s not like they could dust for paw prints back then. Although, I do feel like the final part of the plan is relying a bit too heavily on luck. What if the cat doesn’t run to a hay-filled barn? Or, what if the fire attached to its back kills it before it even gets back to the town? There’s not much a kitty cat can do if it’s burnt to a crisp, I don’t care which of its nine lives it’s on. Obviously, it’s highly unlikely that these feline firebombs were ever used in actual combat, this is surprisingly not only secluded to Germany. After discovering these odd illustrations, Mitch Fraas, Scholar in Residency at the University of Pennsylvania, began searching for similar occurrences in other Renaissance era manuscripts. Apparently, strapping a cat to a stick of dynamite, aiming it at your enemies and hoping for the best is an idea that many people came up with. Luckily for cats everywhere, it was never put into practice. However, this leaves Rocket Cats wide open to be used as the name of an excellent punk rock band.
All that being said, we all know how devious and conniving cats can be so it’s not that hard to imagine how ideas like this may have come up. I mean, just look at these cats:
http://www.samproof.tv/2014/08/04/german-rocket-cats-of-the-16th-century/https://i2.wp.com/www.samproof.tv/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/rocket-cats-1_77412_990x742.jpg?fit=650%2C688https://i2.wp.com/www.samproof.tv/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/rocket-cats-1_77412_990x742.jpg?fit=141%2C150videoWeird Newsblog,blogger,comedy,dark ages,exploding,funny,germany,history,News,rocket cats,weirdThose Germans. If nothing else, you have to admit they're pretty imaginative when it comes to warfare. The University of Pennsylvania recently digitized manuscripts which reveal that even as far back as the 16th century, there were some pretty interesting ideas regarding how to best besiege an enemy city. If you...Zack BesedaZack BesedaZack.Beseda@gmail.comAuthorZack Beseda is a writer comedian in Los AngelesSam Proof